Corporate

Some of the best ways to quit your job

May 15, 2012 // 0 Comments

So the more and more I talk to other analysts about work, it really hits me that no one, not one single person likes being there. Its pretty amazing when you think about it. You go through 12 years of school, studying hard so that you get the marks to then do another 5 years of uni, studying hard so that you can get the job that you think you [...]

Investment banking bonuses and following that yellow brick road

April 25, 2012 // 0 Comments

Its Bonus Time and I can’t stop singing in my head “its the most wonderful time of the year” like Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone 2 when he gets to spend the day in the toy store with all the awesome Christmas toys…this feeling is despite our expectations having been sufficiently managed down to the extent that I really should be singing, [...]

That moment when you spend too much time in Excel

April 21, 2012 // 1 Comment

I’m currently modelling to distract myself from having just witnessed the grossest thing I’ve ever seen at work – I just saw one of the oldest, sleaziest, tannest, “I will hit on any female form with a heartbeat” directors, changing in the open plan kitchen at work. I never EVER want to see that much orange, saggy skin near peanut [...]

The dreaded Friday work bombs

April 13, 2012 // 0 Comments

It’s almost 4pm on a Friday and miraculously I’ve managed to spend the entire day online shopping. With my smooth avoidance of work I feel like that last olive in the bowl that is next to impossible to pick with a toothpick… haha try and pick me with work if you can, but I’ll just say that I’m busy on X and Y’s work even though I [...]

What to do when you get asked to do a random research task…pretend to do it

February 20, 2012 // 0 Comments

So this morning my MD has asked me to look for [insert random, tiny, irrelevant research task which I know can’t be found because I’ve already looked, here], so I’m just waiting around, looking like I’m intently typing/searching so that I can email him back in 5 minutes to say that I couldn’t find anything. It never ceases to amaze me [...]

I have a confession…I just cried at work

February 12, 2012 // 0 Comments

I’m eating a can of beetroot for lunch today and I’m happy to admit that I have been truly impressed by said can of beetroot. Its such an underestimated vegetable that it makes me even doubt its a vegetable because it tastes so good! It has such a nice colour too…both the beetroot and the light purple splashes on my top from spilling [...]

When your director returns from the dead…I mean returns to work

January 27, 2012 // 0 Comments

Thanks to a well devised strategy to serve corporate greed, executed through cancelling my overbooked flight, I’ve managed to find myself spending Australia Day at the airport….in the terminal for the low cost carriers. There is no better place to witness the true fabric of our glorious country. Just sitting here I’ve already seen a young [...]

Can’t Be Fucked (CBF) Syndrome is real and it’s reaching epidemic proportions

January 23, 2012 // 0 Comments

Today at work, I was reflecting on the old adage ‘Get Rich or Die Tryin’. It might be the years of corporate greed that’s starting to seep into my bloodstream, but I’m actually starting to understand what Fiddy Cent meant by that. Except that whilst he was probably talking about dying as the victim of a drive by shooting following a deeply [...]

All the smart kids are getting stuck in traditional professions and are miserable

January 18, 2012 // 0 Comments

So today is the start of the new work year, yet unlike the start of a new school year there’s no new, freshly contacted text books or new stationery to help ease the blow. Its pretty depressing knowing that you go from almost 18 years of 16 weeks “annual leave” to just 4. Admittedly my arrival back at work has not been as hectic as I [...]

How to face time at work like a boss

December 21, 2011 // 0 Comments

I could not be border today (as in bored-er). I don’t understand why we need to sit here and surf the internet until what is considered a “normal” finish time. Apparently our employment contracts says that we must work all “reasonable hours” which no doubt was intended to mean that you must work from 8am to 6am the next day every day, [...]